Welcome brave adventurer!


Bring thy torches (and a clean pair of underwear) and prepare thyself to enter the deepest, darkest, muck-infested tangle and confusion known as ... Dungeons!


Deep within the gullet of the darkness lies a treasure.  Nay, *the* treasure!  For it is thy quest to seek the great crystal that holds the power to bring light to the realm...  No.  Actually it is just because thy king is a bit greedy and covets it.  NEVERTHELESS!  IT IS THY QUEST!


SEEK YE THE CRYSTAL!!

Heroes of the Realms:

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Brave, true, ...and available.  So describes these mighty heroes!  Choose wisely.

Bestiary:

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Know thy foe!  For they come with sharp, pointy teeth--and bad breath!

There be objects!

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When delving, there be many a useful item, or glinty coin that may catch thine eye.  

There be Poison Items

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Many a wicked item is scattered though the dungeon to steal thy health.  If ye find them, run!

There be Food

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A full belly cures many ails!  Find ye the food scattered through the dungeon to build up thy health.

There be Treasure

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By jove!  A great many treasure lies in the dungeon to fill thy coffers!  Get ye the shiny!

Elf: Big heart... not so big stature.  Luckily, the elf is well armed with a mighty bow that will strike fear into the hearts of creatures half it's size.

Warrior: A brave lad!  Skilled with an axe, and can make himself handy.  Also good at oragami.

Valkyrie: Total girl power!  She has a sword and likes to use it on nasty creatures!

Wizard: Back out of retirement, this brave soothsayer is out to hurl fire at the forces of evil that he can catch, and make it back for meatloaf night.  MMMMMMMM! Meatloaf!

Minions: Mean little creatures out to steal your lunch money.  They are not particularly powerful, but definately not to be ignored.

Ghosts: Ask thyself...  Do I believe in ghosts?  Nay?  Fool, I say!  For the white-sheet bandits run amok in the deepest, darkest corners.

Frogs: There be no frogs here! (But, be thee ware anyway!)

Big Head: Forsooth!  It's head is large--but it's brain is small!  It hungers ...Well, for small vermin--but I guess you will do!

Devils: Filled with infernal infernalness, and out to annoy with pointy horns.

Deaths: Eerie, quiet, and irritable.  A bad combination not to be trifled with.  And yet, it is inevitable...

Dragons: Hark!  It is the wing-ed beast!  Truly a fearsome foe on the hunt for heroes to turn into sausages.

Skeleton: Large, disembodied skull running amok!  Just think how much more intimidating the whole creature would have been!

Map: The great Giggle hast gone deep into the dungeon and left ye maps of each dungeon.  Make use of these, brave adventurer!  SEEK YE THE GIGGLE MAPS!

Compass: The mythic G.P.S. (Generally, Point ye Somewhere)!  It is the tool all true heroes need, for it points thy way to the exit or dungeon key.

Key: Monsters are always leaving the spare key around, and can never seem to find it.  Make use of their folly and get ye to the next level!

Exit: Huzzah!  The Exit!  All good levels must come to an end. But worry not, more to come.

Invisibility: Were ye there?  I did not see ye!

Shield: Ye be the best dressed hero with this shiny item.  And look, not a scratch upon thee!

Backpack: A mighty item for a mighty haul!  Much more treasure can be yours with this item.

Smelly pile: A foul smell can ward away many foes!  An especially foul smell wards away friends as well!

Rose: A beauty in such a dark place, but every rose has it's thorn...

Poison: A measure by ye ole exterminator to control the monster problem. It's not working!

Skull: A reminder of the dangers of the dungeon.  Do not make ye the same mistake as this fellow.

Animal Skull: The rats grow big here!  And such dangerous and pointy teeth!

Apple: There is never a fruit so sweet as the one found lying randomly about.

Meat: A shank of meat... In this place?  T'is a miracle!

Wine: Ah, the sweet fruit of the vine!  It brings a warmth to the soul...

Potion: Proof that the poor apothecary that ventured here met an untimely demise.

Coins: A pile of pocket change it may be, but each glinting coin adds up.

Ring: A thing of beauty lost by a wandering soul that is now thy boon.

Diamond: Art thou mad that ye would leave such a thing lying around?  T'is a diamond, lad!

Gold Chest: The great treasure of captain Nobeard!  Now where dids't he leave that ship...